I'm always hungry.

I swear that's why i'm so fat. I love food. So, i'm making myself SICK by looking at recipes. I'm hoping for a better year of eating. I've already managed to RUIN that. But, being that we're only in the SECOND month into the year. Gaw, I hate when the beginning of the year comes - I'm telling you now, and I'll keep reminding you, promises are made to be broken. haha. Broken promises happen a lot during your lifetime without you even noticing it! I'm seeking good diabetic food, or low carb food.

I had a rough day with my little peanut today. He was super fussy throughout Walmart (day2). He was like that too the other day we visited Walmart. I believe my son hates walmart. And, the first store my daughter disliked was Costco! haha. Oh my kids.

I was on skype today. Made me miss my mom, and my home. Gosh homesickness sucks. On another note, I did start a blogspot for my mom (i'll get you the story). I started it a few months ago. See, my mom is ill. She had kidney failure (2nd time in her life, god bless her) and she remains on dialysis until a transplant is available. Guys, the demand for a kidney is insane. Well when I started it, I had full intention of starting my moms story. I want to do a project for her to help raise funds for her and her family. God knows I have taken a lot from my mom thruout the years and from when I was a little girl - I have to give back. I was a rotten child. Believe me when I say it. Well, i briefly put it on hold and in the meantime we found out, thanksgiving week, that my stepdad (my moms husband) has cancer. My little sister, my moms other child, is also amongst their story. She was born 26 week fetal age and she was VERY premature. Nothing wasn't developed well. She has a hole in her heart. I'll send over the link somehow. I need to get this started and quick! My mom has been supporting me a little, being that I live on another island and I'm struggling (in my own way, I ain't gonna lie), and she told me that my stepdads hospital bills are starting to roll in.

So, my intentions are to help raise funds in their name by creating things.. like sewing (i'm not perfect at it but it's worth the shot), sell my photography (I live in Hawaii for god sake someone is bound to notice, right? oh there goes my ego i'm sorry), and/or bake sale? I don't know, we'll see. I also can design online. But, that doesn't lead me anywhere (i've tried).

If anyone has any tips on what I could do. Please, let me know. Thanks.

Anyways, it's 1:30am. I have a husband that is outta commission (he slept wrong a few nights ago and have been struggling with muscle spasms) and i have a naughty jealous toddler and a fussy baby! It's time for bed.